Trans Experiences at BMHS: Part 3

By Nicolaj Arroyo

Arts & Entertainment Editor

February 2022

Last issue, this segment was missing.

For that, I apologize. I will be speaking to Elliott Rodriguez, who graduated from Beloit Memorial in 2019. Elliott is non-binary and pansexual.

How has your treatment regarding being trans changed from being at BMHS to where you are now?

My answer is a little hard to explain, so bear with me, okay? So, at BMHS, if you came out, it was a lot of: "Okay, great, how can we support you? Our GSA meets on this day after school, can we use your pronouns when talking to your family? Can we call you this in class?"

Whereas in college, it was like. "Oh, you're trans? Cool, I guess." And that was it.

As an adult in college, it's not really a concern anymore—thankfully—about the safety of [being out]. My college also had a GSA, but I never went.

And most of the professors and staff also put their pronouns in their email signatures to show that they were supportive.

I will say, though, that my college also had a gender-neutral bathroom, so that was pretty cool. But, staff at BMHS were more emotionally supportive of trans and LGBTQ+ students.

How would you describe your treatment by staff, in regards to your gender identity?

It was pretty good. Every staff member (who knew that I was trans) called me by my preferred name.

It was actually Ms. Hoppe who was the first teacher to ask how I wanted to be called. Had she not been accepting, I never would've been able to tell the other staff members.

Once I told the other teachers: "This is my new name," they all jumped on board. There were some teachers I was still too nervous to go and tell myself, though.

Now, looking back, it was really silly of me.

If you're asking how the treatment of trans students at BMHS has improved since graduation, I'm not sure. I can imagine, with Covid impacting if classes are virtual or not, that might cause some fear from students to come out, solely due to not getting to know teachers as well over a computer.

But, given the staff members that are still at BMHS since I graduated, I can imagine that at least those staff members are still very accepting and dedicated to making sure school can be a safe place for students, especially the LGBTQ+ ones.

It's those staff members, the ones who look out for students, that can change a life for the better.

So, if those staff members are still there, then I can imagine that treatment of trans students at school has been pretty similar.

I see. In your adult life, in regards to medical treatment, how has your experience been finding inclusive healthcare, whether for medical transition or otherwise?

Unfortunately, a lot of healthcare places are religion based. When it comes to inclusive healthcare, it's been really hard. I've had doctors that don't believe I'm trans. It seems most doctors care mostly about "What if you want kids?" as they do with females in general.

"Oh, you're having bad headaches? You're probably pregnant." "Oh, you have a weird rash, you're probably pregnant."

As a trans person, it's just frustrating to constantly have any health issue chalked up to pregnancy, as well as the overall dismissal of AFAB* health issues in general.

I haven't transitioned physically, so I haven't had many issues with that.

What advice do you have for trans kids still in high school?

If you're safe enough to come out now, you should. Even if it's just to your friends. A lot of trans people will change their names a couple times before finding the right one, so it gives you a chance to figure it out sooner, as well as it's good to have that safe space to be yourself.

Even if [there's] just one teacher you trust, come out to them, but also let them know if it's not okay to tell your parents your real name.

What policy or social change would you like to see happen not just at BMHS, but in general?

Aside from a gender neutral bathroom, I feel like asking students their pronouns and preferred names should be just as common as the "tell me a random fact about yourself" that people do on first days.

Even though this isn't a rule or anything (aside from common decency), to not out students to their parents without a student's permission. It can be very harmful.

What is adult life like as a trans person ? Many of us can't imagine living long after high school, and the fact that you have is an inspiration.

It's a lot easier after high school. When you're an adult, you can be yourself. You can change your name, you can fully transition. You can be yourself regardless of which path you take.

While I know high school is hard, once you move away from your parents, nobody can stop you from dyeing your hair, or anything else you may use to express yourself. You'll still have people who "don't get it" or are jerks, but ultimately, they don't matter. You can block them, you can look for a better job, you can find more friends.

When you're an adult the only things that limit you are laws and money. So be yourself, and be happy.

If you can't right now, I know it's hard, but just get through high school. It's a couple years, and I know it is hard but I know you can do it, because I did. I know that's stupid, but I have succeeded in very little in life. So if I can do it, I know you can.

Also, pro-tip: some companies (example: Starbucks) will help cover the cost of transitioning.

Other places have a policy that your bosses have to call you by your preferred name (Pizza Hut), and most colleges, unless [religion]- based, will have policies to help LGBTQ+ students.

So do your research and hang in there, because you can do it.

*AFAB is a medical term that stands for Assigned Female at Birth.

This term applies to people regardless of gender or chromosomes, and refers only to the appearance and function of the reproductive organs. .

**If you would like to be featured in one of these interviews, anonymous or otherwise, please reach out to Nick at: arroymye000@stu.sdb.k12.wi.us